The Real Walking Dead

I've been forcibly inducted into a club I never wanted to join.

The hazing ritual is brutal, unlike anything you can imagine.

Against my will, and with no acceptance on my part, I now belong to a group of people who are the strongest, kindest, most compassionate, most raw, loving people on the planet.

We are the grieving parents, the real walking dead.

We died the day our children died, but our hearts kept beating. We look alive on the outside, but on the inside we are a rotting corpse.

And we talk about you.

We "bless your hearts" and we shake our heads and roll our eyes. You go about your lives in ignorant bliss, and we are jealous.

You complain about teenage angst, toddler tantrums, all-nighters with a new baby, and we want to slap you, and we want to be you.

We miss the days when we were ignorant, when we said stupid things trying to comfort someone. We miss the days when our worst struggles were what was for dinner, a messy house, or a disagreement with our spouse.

It's like Hotel California in here. We can check out but we can never leave.

But we don't want you in here. As much as we wish you could understand and comfort us the way we need to be comforted, we do not want you in this club.

It is the only way you would understand or be able to comfort us the way we deeply truly need, but its not worth it. We don't want a single other member to join ever.

But new members come daily. And we slide over to give them room, put an arm around them and we begin at the beginning with them, over and over.

Dear Future Daughters-In-Law

As I watch my little boys grow up to be men, I reflect on how I have tried to prepare them for life. It is very important to me that they have well-rounded skills that will be helpful to them as husbands.

Lifeskills, if you will, that will be useful to them and also be appreciated by their wives. My husband has been consistent to teach them manly things, yet he was never taught to notice or do things that would have helped me out around the house, especially when i had just given birth, or was working a night shift.

So the list of things he has been teaching them includes minor car repair, and maintenance, yard work, small engine work, plumbing, electrical, appliance repair, farm maintenance, driving a stick, etc. I am eternally grateful to have married a man with these skills. He has saved us countless dollars by being an all around amazing handyman.

He has also led them on the path of a strong Christian man. They know what a faithful Christian leader looks like, and they have been practicing diligently in prayer and study and worship. They see how their dad leads our family, yet works together with their mama to lead their home.

I have added to those skills the daily, often overlooked kind of skills, like cooking, meal planning, washing dishes, laundry, cleaning a bathroom, first aid, babysitting, managing money, sewing, reading for pleasure, etc.

I want you to know that I have put my heart into preparing them for you. Whether they retain these skills, or recognize when they are needed, is on them. They cannot plead ignorance when there are no clean plates, or underwear. So don't let em fool ya!

I am so excited at the thought of having precious ladies in our family who are loved deeply by my sons. I look forward to sweet babies that I can spoil and love on! You are the reason I can let go of my sadness over the passing of time. I cannot wait to know you!

P.S.  Dear Future Son-In-Law.......... Good Luck!

School Days

just wanted to put a couple pictures on line to preserve them for posterity. or whatever.
Farmer boy is absolutely going to get elective credits for car maintenance! Here is evidence that he was changing the oil in the van. Child labor at its finest!

 

The next picture is evidence that we did kindergarten work! We have loved using Five in a Row and are so grateful to friends who were willing to lend us not only FIAR books but the books that go with them!! What you see is a mass of story disks, for geography! This has been the easiest and most fun way to connect stories that otherwise could be totally unrelated.  I absolutely plan to do this again when Minnie starts "formal" education. =P

 

Sorry for the flash, no natural light in the hallway. This is showing two years of geography for the big boys. We used Richard Halliburton's Book of Marvels, the occident and the orient. This was recommended by the same amazing friend who lent us FIAR! Along with keeping journals of each place visited, we would put a pin in the map and keep a red thread going from place to place. There are 60 locations, 30 per year. some were too close for their own pin. I can't think about what the wall behind looks like!!

 

so just a little evidence of what school we managed to get through during these crazy times.

Blessings!

On My Mind

I have spent way too much time on facebook lately. I never really spent much time at all there, but lately I find myself sucked in to reading everyone's updates. I have always been annoyed by the pointless updates about going to the store, what they are eating, etc. And don't even get me started on telling me you are at Disney, or whereever, "Thanks for the info" says the stalker who is breaking into your house because you wont be back for a week!!!!

So one thing that is heavy on my heart is this whole gay marriage stuff. I am gonna just say this, it doesn't matter whether or not it becomes legal. We already legally kill babies everyday, one million of them, every day. Murder is sin, homosexuality is sin. period. Mans laws do not override Gods laws. period. But, don't be surprised when pedophilia becomes legalized, then beastiality, because that is the path we are one. What? If you think homosexuals are born that way, and can't help their urges and should be free to express them, then you have no arguement against pedophiles who will say that they were born with those urges and cant help themselves and therefore should be free to express them. There is nothing new under the sun. These sins have been going on since the beginning of time, and will continue until God has had enough.

Then there is Easter, all over the internet, everyone is remembering Christ and how he died on the cross. Yep, once a year, lets make a big deal about it. We are commanded by Christ to remember him daily, and to ceremonially remember him every week. Every Sunday we are to go to the cross and remember how he died for our sins. We are all sinners in need of Him. I am not a holier than thou Christian. I need forgivness and grace. every. day. I am not up on a soap box preaching, I am down on my knees. Seeking God's mercy. I just want to say that celebrating Easter, or Christmas for that matter, are just feel good holidays, not really worshipping God the way he has commanded.

No matter what our nation does, or who our president is, or what laws are passed, or how hypocritical we can all be. No matter what, I have to choose how I live, you have to choose how you live. I am chosing to do my best to follow God's will, to live as close to Christ as I can get. Yes, I believe in the perfect completeness of the Bible, all of it. I am not perfect, not even close.

This may be the first time I am writing here about deep stuff, but I don't think it will be the last time. I am finding my voice and my courage to say what needs to be said.

Adoption Day

Finally! I can't even put words together yet, but I wanted to share a few pictures from today! We want to thank the judge, lawyer, and especially our adoption caseworker for all the hard work and time that it took to get to today.  We went out for ice cream afterwards to celebrate! Expect more pics and stories soon..... maybe :)

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Toy Kitchen

I have so much to share that I still can't! I can't wait till February to share pictures of our family!! For now here are a couple pics of the toy kitchen we built for Minnie. It turned out exactly like the vision in my head, thanks to my personal carpenter, the Farmer. Here is the only before shot I took..... sorry.

This was a small tv cabinet with glass doors on the front and a swivel top so the tv could move around. We had already removed the doors and the top before I got this pic.....again, sorry.

Now for the after, because I didn't take a single during pic.......... bad blogger, sorry.

So, we used the board that swiveled as the oven door and a divider for the oven and the shelves. We used the magnetic thingies (technically correct word, of course) as the closure for the oven. It works great. I didnt take a pic inside, but we used old wire shelving for a rack. The sides and back are left over beadboard from my pantry redo (I haven't blogged about that either, sorry). The shelves were some I have had for years that I never found a home for. The sink is a dog food bowl. The knobs for the stove and the faucet came from Lowes. The faucet was the most expensive thing for the whole project. If I had planned better I would have gone to the Habitat store. Oh well, I probably spent less since I didn't burn the gas to go there. The stove eyes are cds, I just hot glued them for now, so far so good! The window was made of scraps, it is open on the top so I can change out the scene. For now it is snowing outside, haha! I sewed the curtains, a potholder, and an apron out of the same fabric. I don't looove it but the colors match my kitchen so it will do for now. I made some felt and fabric food too! So far, bowtie pasta, ravioli, strawberries, and eggs. I didnt use any real patterns but the general ideas found on pinterest and other blogs. I am not the one to teach how to sew, I tend to fly by the seat of my pants. It usually works out. I got various accessories from walmart and the dollar tree. The mickey mouse salt and pepper shakers came from target. I knew Minnie would looove them.

She is sooo tiny! I like decorating the shelves since she can't reach them!!!

The kitchen total cost was almost $50. Not bad for a one of a kind awesome toy that will be used for a long time. All the accessories was another $20. So it was still way cheaper than a comparable storebought version.

I forgot to take a pic of the fridge. We have a small antique icebox that a friend was throwing away, so I spray painted it white and the inside aqua blue. Minnie keeps here plastic fruits and veggies in there.

So there it is! Come on over and play some time!

 

 

 

First Engagement Shoot

Had a great  shoot with a sweet couple! They were very patient with me and went along with my ideas even when they didn't work out!!!

These are straight out of the camera. I am trying to learn how to use picasa to glam it up.

Welcome Home Party

So it has been a whirlwind month!!! The kids are finally here and we are all adjusting. We are counting our blessings and things are going so much better than we could have expected. So here are a couple pics of the party. I took none during the party so I have to thank the Farmer's sister (you know who you are) for taking pics for us. I had lots of help in preparing and during the party too, so thanks to all of you who stepped in to help. Much love y'all!

I made super yummy cupcakes.... chocolate, vanilla, and pumpkin spice!!! They were a big hit! And the candy bar was a big hit too!

This last pic is the best I can do for now till we can legally post pics online. Trust me, they are cute!!

Daddy!!!

So I cant post pictures of our newest additions yet! But I thought I could get away with this picture because you can't see their faces but you can definitely see their excitement when Daddy got to the park!!

chair before and after after

So actually this is  an after after and and after after after.... allow me to explain.

These chairs came from a consignment/antique store in the next town over. I bought them for school chairs for the boys. Originally they were yellow with loooovely blue fabric that had yellow flowers. I may have a picture of that somewhere.

So i painted them black and put fabric that met each boys approval, one was Elvis inspired the other was spiders. Those of you who know my kids personally will know which chair was for which boy.

Then I took the chairs away from them and painted them white and put some caauutte fabric on them that my sister bought me for my birthday. Then I didn't really love them. They sat neglected, moved around the house, used mostly by the cats.

Now I have found at least one of them a new identity!!! He is definitely a boy, and is rocking it in the revamped boy room, to be revealed later. I recovered him in denim. I liked the idea of using old jeans but i didnt have any that I could spare, so he may get another makeover one day. I like the look and usefulness of pockets. Wouldnt that be cool??

Would you like to actually see a picture now???

 

So the chair on the left was what both chairs looked like and the one on the right is the denim. The cat is just nosy.

 

Bonus picture: the chair and the new chalkboard wall. Except it is actually in the master because I thought we would move the three boys to the master and then we didn't. So although there is a chalkboard wall in their room, this one is in my room. And I think I may keep it, at least until I get enough energy to repaint my room again!!

 

More pictures to come soon!!!

FINALLY!

Just got the phone call we have been waiting nearly two years for! We were picked to adopt two foster siblings! I cannot describe the feeling I have right now! Shock and Awe!

The boys can't seem to focus on their work! My mind is going a million different directions!

I cant wait to share pictures, but that will have to wait till they are ours!

Two cool things I want to remember. One is that their foster mom homeschools, so that may be a factor in our finally being chosen. Two is the biggest reason she did not adopt them herself is because every night the boy would pray for a dad, he has never had one and his foster mom is single. She gave up keeping them to give him his dream. I hope Farmer is up for the challenge! This boy has some expectations of what a dad does and we aim to please!

So now we will have Farmer boys 1,2, and 3 and a Farmer's Daughter!

Prayers are always answered, either yes, no, or wait! So all the times we prayed for certain kids God was telling us to wait. He had our kids in mind all along!


I am excited to begin this journey! Our eyes are open, we know it wont be an easy road, but we are ready!

Blessings,
Farmer's Wife

Sunday Morning

So we needed a new family pic to go along with our homestudy. Hopefully it will help the staff like us and actually pick us for a child or children!!!

I had to take the opportunity while we were all fresh and clean before getting dressed for church! We ran outside, plopped on a blanket, and I set the camera on a stepladder and set the timer. I should have kept some of the funny shots when I was trying to sit down, fix my hair, and shoo the cat!!!

My knees are wet because I kneeled down before I thought about the ground being wet!

I think it is cute, considering we don't have any recent pictures of our family. I really need to take more pics of my kids. They are growing so fast!

Pageant Pics

Just some cute shots I took of a friends daughter for a pageant. She is a cutie!

2012-13 Curriculum

A Little Schoolhouse 2012-2013 Curriculum

I have decided to finally use this blog I have been saving for a couple of years. I guess I just needed to start somewhere! This post is so I can begin recording what we study each year.This will be our 4th year homeschooling! Wow! I am becoming more confident as we go even though we are entering the more challenging years. I have seen my focus for our family shift to more spiritual growth allowing academics to come alongside after. It has made a world of difference in all our attitudes!

We are using Ambleside Online year 6 as our base with other books added or removed as needed. Studying Modern day, then beginning again with ancients. Both boys are in the same AO year, with the 8^th grader doing higher math and science, and additional grammar work.

BIBLEContinue reading through the Bible in a year Continue sermon work
Book of Acts
Life of Paul

Memory
Historical speeches and long passages of scripture, TBD

Citizenship
T1
Shakespeare play, King Lear
T2,3
Plutarch lives: Pericles, Fabius, Nicias

History/History Tales/ Biographies
T1
What Everyone should know about the 20^th Century, Axlerod (selections)
Tales from Ancient Egypt,, Green
T2
Augustus Caesar’s World, Foster
The Story of the Greeks, Guerber
Genesis, Finding our Roots, Beechick
T3
Augustus Caesar’s World, Foster
The Story of the Romans, Guerber
Never Give In, Churchill, Mansfield

 Watch The Sound of Music(T1), Swiss Family Robinson(T1) The Ten Commandments(T1), The Hobbit(T2), Ben Hur(T3)

Book of Centuries
Begin new book with study of ancients.

Geography
Book of Marvels, the Orient, Halliburton
Missionary Travels, Livingston
Bible maps, Wall Maps, journaling

Natural History/Science
Handbook of Nature Study, Comstock
Nature journaling
T1,2
School of the Woods, Long
T2,3
The Sea Around Us, Carson (skipping over evolution in chapter 1)
C 6^th grade Apologia General Science with labs and journaling
E 8^th grade Apologia Physical Science with labs and journaling

Science Biography
T1
Albert Einstein and the theory of relativity, Cwiklik
T2
Archimedes and the Door of Science, Bendick
T3
Galileo and the Magic Numbers, Rosen

Math
C 6^th grade: continue MOTL, using Khan Academy
E 8^th grade: Algebra 1, Foerester, with home study companion cd from Math without borders

P.E.
Basketball

Penmanship/Copywork/Spelling Dictation
Spelling Wisdom, vol 1-5

Handiwork
Gardening, Farming, Cooking, Automobile maintenance
 Foreign Language

Finish Getting Started with Latin, Linney
Begin First year of Latin, Gunnison and Harley, with Linney lectures online
Boys may study chosen languages of Mandarin and German in their free time.

Poetry
T1 Robert Frost
T2 Carl Sandburg
T3 Alfred Noyes

We will read selected poems and discuss, some memorization, and adding to journals.

　
Art/ Composer

T1
Renoir/ Debussy
T2
Ruisdael & Hooch / Bach
T3
Seurat/ Opera Overtures

We will look at/ listen to selections during lunch and tea time, then add journal entries and drawings.

Literature
Age of Fable, Bulfinch, finish book this year
T1,2
The Hobbit, Tolkien
Call of the Wild
T2
Animal Farm, Orwell
Swiss Family Robinson
T3
(Iliad)Tales of Troy and Greece, Lang
Ben Hur

Additional Reading

T1
The Cat of Bubastes, Henty
T3
Joel, A boy from Galilee

Fairyland of Science
Tom Sawyer, Twain
Roll of Thunder, Hear my Cry
Miracle on Maple Hill
Von Trapp Family Singers
Snow Treasure
Rob Roy
Huckleberry Finn, Twain
Little Men, Alcott
Jack and Jill, Alcott
Cricket on the Hearth, Dickens
20 thousand Leagues under the Sea
Penrod
God’s Smuggler
Carry on Mr. Bowditch
Goodbye Mr. Chips
Number the Stars